Yesterday I had another appointment for a colposcopy and again I made Tom come along and hold my hand. This was the first time he met Dr. T, and I really like her. Young and very receptive to listening to my educated desires about my health. Such as the fact that I find these procedures uncomfortable and would like to stop having them for grins and giggles every 3 months.
I reminded Tom of the ground rules; Number One is to hold my hand, Number Two is NOT to faint, and Three is don’t stray from my head (which will assist in Number Two). I told him that if possible, if he could keep up some light conversation with the doctor, that goes a long way toward distracting me and making the process seem like it’s moving along.
I guess I should have specified what kind of conversation is acceptable. It was near the beginning of the procedure when Dr. T mentioned something about experiencing discomfort.
Tom: E – you should know a thing or two about discomfort. You live with a white Poodle.
Elizabeth: That doesn’t cause me discomfort, that causes YOU discomfort.
At which point the doctor started laughing. The kind where you know you shouldn’t laugh and the situation doesn’t call for laughter, but you can’t stop giggling. And Tom, being a guy in an Lady Parts office, also had the nervous giggles. And I’m all like, “Hello!!! Lady with the sharp implements near my very delicate bits…maybe you want to stop shaking so much down there!”
Rule Number Four: Don’t induce body-shaking laughter in doctors with sharp instruments.